First of all, the Latin festival.
Saturday was shaping up to be a good one. Latin festival on Johnston St. was on. Time to eat some delicious food and get our drink on with some amigos above the T-shirt takeaway. Its was all good. The food was fucking bueno. A bit later in the day it started to rain, which wasnt that bad because it was still kind of hot, and it didnt really matter if you got a little wet.
Afterwards Jasmine and I thought we would go to a party not far from home. We got a taxi home, and I was up for a bit of small talk with the driver. The problem was, I have this unintentional habit of trying to get on the same level as who I'm talking to. For example; if I talk to a truck driver I'm all "g`day mate, hows the fucking weather for ya? alright if your a fucking duck!" and if I go to the chemist or something I'm a bit "oh, excuse me miss, could I trouble you for some of your most delightful haemorrhoid cream?" and my tone of voice changes dramatically. So in a taxi I tend to change my accent to the drivers and hopefully make them feel a bit more comfortable for a conversation. It kind of worked and we just talked about the best Indian restaurants in Melbourne "I lllike spize vood" sort of thing. Infact I didnt even realise until we jumped out and said "why where you talking like a fuckhead to that guy?"
So we grabbed the bikes and umbrellas and headed for the bottle shop. By this stage it was fucking pissing down and the streets where almost flooding. But because the party and the bottle shop wasnt so far, we thought the bikes and brollies would suffice. And the surely did not. By the time we got to the bottle shop, our clothes looked a little wet. We missed the closing time by about 2 minutes and the rain just got worse and worse. We tried to ride up and down Sydney Rd, to find alcohol but everywhere was shut. By this stage it was established we where wet and should go home. And it was in the way home, after Jasmine screaming at me for riding off to many times, she misjudged the gutter and fell straight in a huge puddle on the road as a car was coming. Its dark, wet and Jasmines ass over in a puddle of water with a car coming towards her. So I jumped in with my shoes on and ripped her out. The water was up to mid shin level and the car just slowed down and went around. We where absolutely fucking drenched and went strait home. I saw the funny side to it all and had a laugh, to which Jasmine responded by punching me in the ribs.
Thing that are shitting me as of late:
frustration
wet shoes
Christmas, already
when Jasmine says she has keys, but doesn't and we get locked out of the house
university students who feel the need to give their moral 2 cents on everything
people who jump the cue at the supermarket
the taste and thought of custard
war crimes
religion
I wasnt sure if I should laugh or cry when I saw this. Its a little weird.
Keep you burritos out of those burros.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
ooooh yep
Im back again from the depths of the internetless caves, technology depressant, lack of communication devices, 1940`s lifestyle I have been trialing for a new TV series.
No not really, nothing of the sorts. I have been blogslack and cant be assed telling you about things that dont really matter. But today my good readers I will fill you in on a few things.......
The house is going well.
I just turned 22. It feels fucking great. Alot better than 21, by far. At 21 I felt like I had responsibilities to be a 21 y.o. and start doing great things with myself. But now at 22 I have embraced the failures over the last year and thought, fuck it, to hell with them. I am enjoying being a stubborn and opinionated post 21 y.o.
For my birthday we had a BBQ. Lots of meat, beer and good times. I felt Australian. I drank like it was my birthday and was hardly making sense by the end of the night. God it was awesome. For my 21st I felt like I had to make it a special event that I would remember for the rest of my life. I would look back and think, fuck your awesome Reubin, your 21st was the best fun I had since losing my virginity. But in reality it was just another party. I have embraced the finer things in life, like cooking meat to perfection, like its an art form. And making noises like Im on masterchef, slurrping and yelling fuck this is good! I have become more interested in things like herbs and gardening. I am growing up.
The wisdom of a 22 y.o has made me realise I need a purpose or a hobby. So I have started a course in documentry film making. I am really enjoying it. So far we have watched snippets of films and commented on them, one of my favorite things to do. Ill see how the course goes and then decide what steps to take next. I have always liked documentary and always wondered how they are made, so this was right up my alley. I have watched some fucked up films over the last week, one called War Dance. It was like the real life Blood Diamond. Without the diamond or Leo, just stuff about child soldiers and conflict in Africa. It made me cry. Its a sad state of affairs. Also some good stuff about Lionel Rose. Well to do Aboriginal dude that met Elvis, won a world title, spent his money, robbed a primary school and now spends his time talking to his mum and going the greyhound races. Its a wonderful world.
A few funny things have happened, its not all sad. Like the time Jasmine and I got home late and thought a good nights sleep was on the cards, Kevin (the cat) jumped in the bed and tried to snuggle in. Which he usually does so it didnt bother us. After a moment we could smell a burning or something vulgar. We looked at each other and I thought maybe the kitchen was on fire because it smelt like burning plastic and was getting stronger. I was like, what the fuck I just want to go to sleep. So I jumped up and ran into the kitchen. No fire. Checked around the house. No fire. Looked in the bathroom and Kevin had done the biggest shit possible from a feline of any size, right in the middle of the bath. Thanks Kevin. It was fucking horrendous and smelt like someone had pulled a plastic sixpack ring out of a moulding dolphins stomach and burnt it with a lighter under my nose. Not just that, but Kevin had shit all over his ass and in his dreaded winneps, then tried to snuggle in the bed and got cat shit everywhere between the bath and our pillows. Bad times. As you can imagine we had to clean the place and trim Kevins butt hair. Not the best activity when your sleep deprived.
Oh yes thats right, we went to the roller derby. It was fucking lesbians ahoy! It was good but slightly intimidating because of women that would have punched me fair in the cock if I looked at their girlfriends twice. Good times.
Dr Parnassus was good. Go and see it for yourself.
Things that are annoying me as of late:
Climate change skeptics.
Climate change.
Political jargon that does nothing for the benefit of man kind, or anyone and anything.
Uninteresting people that write books about themselves. Like politicians autobiographies or "I had an experience doing something that most people could do" sort of books. It shits me up the wall.
Peace and fucking.
No not really, nothing of the sorts. I have been blogslack and cant be assed telling you about things that dont really matter. But today my good readers I will fill you in on a few things.......
The house is going well.
I just turned 22. It feels fucking great. Alot better than 21, by far. At 21 I felt like I had responsibilities to be a 21 y.o. and start doing great things with myself. But now at 22 I have embraced the failures over the last year and thought, fuck it, to hell with them. I am enjoying being a stubborn and opinionated post 21 y.o.
For my birthday we had a BBQ. Lots of meat, beer and good times. I felt Australian. I drank like it was my birthday and was hardly making sense by the end of the night. God it was awesome. For my 21st I felt like I had to make it a special event that I would remember for the rest of my life. I would look back and think, fuck your awesome Reubin, your 21st was the best fun I had since losing my virginity. But in reality it was just another party. I have embraced the finer things in life, like cooking meat to perfection, like its an art form. And making noises like Im on masterchef, slurrping and yelling fuck this is good! I have become more interested in things like herbs and gardening. I am growing up.
The wisdom of a 22 y.o has made me realise I need a purpose or a hobby. So I have started a course in documentry film making. I am really enjoying it. So far we have watched snippets of films and commented on them, one of my favorite things to do. Ill see how the course goes and then decide what steps to take next. I have always liked documentary and always wondered how they are made, so this was right up my alley. I have watched some fucked up films over the last week, one called War Dance. It was like the real life Blood Diamond. Without the diamond or Leo, just stuff about child soldiers and conflict in Africa. It made me cry. Its a sad state of affairs. Also some good stuff about Lionel Rose. Well to do Aboriginal dude that met Elvis, won a world title, spent his money, robbed a primary school and now spends his time talking to his mum and going the greyhound races. Its a wonderful world.
A few funny things have happened, its not all sad. Like the time Jasmine and I got home late and thought a good nights sleep was on the cards, Kevin (the cat) jumped in the bed and tried to snuggle in. Which he usually does so it didnt bother us. After a moment we could smell a burning or something vulgar. We looked at each other and I thought maybe the kitchen was on fire because it smelt like burning plastic and was getting stronger. I was like, what the fuck I just want to go to sleep. So I jumped up and ran into the kitchen. No fire. Checked around the house. No fire. Looked in the bathroom and Kevin had done the biggest shit possible from a feline of any size, right in the middle of the bath. Thanks Kevin. It was fucking horrendous and smelt like someone had pulled a plastic sixpack ring out of a moulding dolphins stomach and burnt it with a lighter under my nose. Not just that, but Kevin had shit all over his ass and in his dreaded winneps, then tried to snuggle in the bed and got cat shit everywhere between the bath and our pillows. Bad times. As you can imagine we had to clean the place and trim Kevins butt hair. Not the best activity when your sleep deprived.
Oh yes thats right, we went to the roller derby. It was fucking lesbians ahoy! It was good but slightly intimidating because of women that would have punched me fair in the cock if I looked at their girlfriends twice. Good times.
Dr Parnassus was good. Go and see it for yourself.
Things that are annoying me as of late:
Climate change skeptics.
Climate change.
Political jargon that does nothing for the benefit of man kind, or anyone and anything.
Uninteresting people that write books about themselves. Like politicians autobiographies or "I had an experience doing something that most people could do" sort of books. It shits me up the wall.
Peace and fucking.
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